Sooo i started an akuroku fic but I'm not sure if i like it so far. i feel like its poorly written aand any other scenes i have in mind are really hard tto writet about. you think i should continue

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It was November 29th, he thinks, a Saturday afternoon at around...--he's struggling to remember--oh! around 2 pm. Why does he remember so clearly the exact date, the exact time, when he can't even remember where he slept last night? Maybe it's because he's not hopped up on dozens of multi-colored pills and doesn't have three-fourths of liquir bubbling in his tummy. Or maybe it's because the guy who died that day, just happened to be his best friend. Or maybe it's because said best friend reminds him every few days or so.

But to put it in a cheesy and totally Hallmark-y kind of way, Axel says, "Our friendship was so strong that you couldn't be sent to the afterlife or wherever the fuck dead people go." His words are pretty slurred and as he talks, he swings his half-empty half-full beer bottle around for emphasis.

Roxas in his spot beside his friend rolls those pretty eyes of his and asks, "Since when does Hallmark use the word 'Fuck?''

Axel pauses, glazed green eyes looking inquisitive for just a second. The only time in maybe years Axel has ever thought about something so hard. Aside from who the fuck had started that fire. "Fuck should I know." He hisses, the overbearing scent of alchohol wafting to Roxas' nostrils. He scrunches up his nose.

"Even when i'm here, you still drink enough to pass out. Don't you want to remember the times we have?" Roxas asks as he reaches forward, taking the bottle from Axel's shaking hand and holding it up and out of reach.

"Roxaaaas!" Axel whines, getting on all fours and slinking towards Roxas like a cat, feline and agile. "Your always here though. C'mon, gimme." He says in an unnatractive whine voice. In his drunk stupor, he doesn't mind begging and doesn't mind jutting his lower lip out in a pout, eyes big like a puppy dog. Axel crawls over his friend's smaller body, lip slowly sliding over his lips for reasons Roxas wasn't too sure about. Probably thinking about how good alchohol was. Roxas held his arm high, his baby blues staring into the lean man above him.

"What are you doing?" Roxas asks, closing his eyes when Axel brought his face near milimeters away from Roxas', his lips closing in against Roxas' jaw. He always tries to touch, always tries to make some sort of contact. He wants to feel his fingertips graze a part of Roxas. Any part of Roxas. But... "You can never--"

"But I can try." Axel says interupptingly, reaching up and towards Roxas' face, fingers moving slowly, reaching to cup the boy's delicate chin. But when he tries to touch, his fingers move swiftly through air, fizzling and foggy as Axel's fingers remain inside the hallographic-image of his best friend. But he wasn't a hollogram, no, he was simply dead.

With a frustrated growl he lets his body collapse--not onto the boy supposedly underneath him--but the cushions on the couch. The old dingy piece of furniture squeaks under the pressure of a body.

"Ghost, remember?" Roxas says from his new position, standing above Axel, who lay face-down in his old blue couch. His image was so real, not hazy or foggy like the ghosts seen in old movies. He was a bright, solid figure that to Axel, was so decieving, so touchable, so real. Real, even after seeing the scorched corpse of his friend. Skin charred and black but in front of him, Roxas' skin exotic and tan. Did it freak Axel the fuck out? Not really, he's seen crazier things when on acid.

"No shit." Axel responds, words muffled from its current position: buried in between the cushions of the couch. He turns, eyes narrowing at his friend, who in turn smirks.

"What's wrong?" Roxas asks, hands behind his back and clutching Axel's precious liquor. He watches as Axel sits up on his forearms, eyes wide as he remembers just what it was he was crawling over Roxas for.

"Where's my beer?" Axel slurrs, sitting up and heading drunkenly towards Roxas. "Hand the motherfucking beer over." Axel orders and after a moment of hesitation, Roxas scoffs and offers his friend the bottle. Axel takes it, mout spreading into a wide smile and as he sits there, lips nuzzled around the opening of the glass bottle of liquor, he wonders if he holds onto it so tight because he can't do the same to Roxas.

--

There's one more scene but I don't want to post tooo much.

a. People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blog and replace any question that they dislike with a new, original question.
b. Tag eight people. Don't refuse to do that. Don't tag who tagged you.

1. What are your nicknames?
1. What is the significance behind one of your nicknames?
1. WHY SO SERIOUS?
lolol because it's too good to be striked out.

2. How do you style your hair?
2. Do any of your personal electronic items ( cell phone, iPod, computer, etc. ) have names?
2. Could you live off your favorite food for a year?
Hmmm ... italian pasta for a year. hell no i'd be a fucking FATTY

3. What's new in your life right now?
3. What are some things that you are most excited for in the near future?
Christmas!! Even thoughh I still don't know what I want.
School on monday. (derrr not for the school but ferr the people)
Winter Break.

4. How many colors are you wearing now?
Black! Green1 And Purple whee!

5. Are you an introvert or extrovert?
5. What do you normally have for breakfast on a school day?
nothing wheee. cuz if i eat so early in the mornings i feel sick

6. What was the last book you read?
Twilight. lolzz. -ish lame-

7. Do you nap a lot?
7. Favorite past time this summer?
This summer sucked! Last summer was OMG AMAZING!

8. If the person you secretly like is already taken, what would you do?
Uhh ... get over it? And make mean comments about her face! So actually I wouldn't get ovoer it.

9. Is there anything that has made you unhappy these days?
9. What is your favourite holiday(s) and why?
Halloween because you can party it up whee
Thankskgiving because you can stuff your face and it's okay
christmas because family and presents!

10. What was the last thing you ate today?
eggs, sausage, and toast w/butter

11. How long does it take you to get ready in the morning?
10 minuttes to potty and brush my teeth
10 minutes to get dress
20 mintues to do my hair or longer
10 mintues to do my make up.

12. What websites do you visit daily?
livejournal. ff.net. yahoo.


13. What classes are you taking right now?
algerbra 2 apps. english 10. health/careers. T.A. and ... uhm ... i forgot. oh wait ... child carae. and civics.


14. Do you like to clean?
14. What is your favourite thing to clean?
My plate.

15. What do you want for Christmas?
Idk. clothes. my hair did. makeup kit from coastal scents. the nintendo ds and wii lol. I woon't get it thhouoghh. and my nose pierced.

16. What are you doing right now?
16. What would you rather be doing right now?
starting my fucking zack x sora fic thhat i can't seem to startt.

17. Who was your childhood idol?
Leonardo Di Capirio. yummm.

18. What would you do if you see $100 lying on the ground?
18. What is something creepy or freaky that you've seen/heard of recently?
As of today what is your most played song, and how many times?
None? Idk. i've been listening to tila tequila lmao. foor shits and giggles.

19. What is your dream car?
a sexy-ass hot rod. red.

20. What is/are your current obsession(s)?
Writing,dying my hurr, boys, Kingdom hearts, zack/sora. xion. uh uhh uhhh lj. ff.net. yeah. ohh and clothes. and doing my nails FUCK I WANT MY NAILS DONE SO BAD OMGOMGOMGOMGOGM

I tag...crissy.you know who you are. rae! uhh uhh and idk whho else hasn't doone it so whoeover hasn't done it can do it!

AHH i wrote a long-ass Axel x Xion one-shot. okay almost 5,000 not TOO long but pretty long.
anyways, read & review?

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4684059/1/hide&seek

Is there an active lj community where people post fanfic challenges then you can post them. like on ff.net people holld contests like, a recent one I took part in was a beauty&the beast challenge. but is there a community where challenges like this are given? If not i wannaa make one

just read the book and watched the movie. I fucking loved BOTH! So maybe you all can help me getting into the fandom?
I'm willing to do Twilight Drabbles. Only twilight though, none of the other books. So yeah anyone?

BLAH. i'm a dumbdumb. i got brand new clip-in hair extensions




and forgot the clips :( now i can't wear them for a while.

i'm bored and want to take requests.

OMG AND if you are having a hard time writing: go here!http://lab.drwicked.com/writeordie.html

it works, trust me, yesterday i started 4 of the 6 new projects i'm worrkinig on.

School is going good :) Senior year is everything I want it to be with friends, boys, fun classes, and me FINALLY NOT BEIING SHY WHOOOOOOHOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!

lol anyways i have a new friend omar, aww he's so cute :) lol i know, i know random.

so i haven't updated in a while but i've haad a few changes. i dyed my hair "Chocolate Cherry", My BDay is this Friday, and I got my septum pierced


I got it done Sunday, and had this huge ass jewelery,
but today, stupidly, I changed it, which couold cause infection, DAMN.

and now im pissed this girl is flirting with my gf. fuck her =/

i haven't posted in a while but i'm so fucking mad!!!!

i haven't cried so much in a while and tonight i've cried so much and so fucking hard.

firstly, i watched a SAAD fucking movie, about a transgender person, gwen aroujo, and i cried my eyes out at how sad it was. i talked to my mom about how i felt and she understood, then i talked to my dum idiotic homophobic dad, who said ii shouldn't be watatching stupid movies and i'm stupid.

i crried about it for an hour THEN started reading on livejournal, someone mentioned their cat died. i started crying again because my FAV cat Simba is going to die in a afew years of old age, and my dog sara, next year, because of old age and leg problems.

THEN i heard my mom outside fucking with the brownies i made for my friend's Bday tommorow. she took a HUGE chunk so i got mad and showed it to my dad like "Wtf look how much she took" my dad said i wwas selfish and whhen i yelled back that it was my friend's he said 'fuck you your selfish i'm sick of it' and its like ... wtf its for my friend and how can you even say fuck you to yyouor daughter.

and i love my dad soooo much and for him to say that to me broke me, i've already cried so much toniight, i don't need more.

i'm dating a girl and the fact that my parents don't tolerate it drives me crazy, my animals are going to die soon, and my dad cusses me outt.

fuck toniight iis horriible :''( i just wanna dye my fucking hair and get a piercing!! it'll make everything better.

school in a min. me and my friend are gona ditch 1st yay.

i think im gna try and befrriend this cuute guy who sits alonne at lunchc although my frriend don't want me to.

he smiles at me, mayybe he thinks iim cute :)

idky, but i looove readidng people's plot bunniees. dose anyonne like to ddod the same? tell me somee plot bunnies, i PROMISE I wonn't steeal, but i may get inspired.

damn i'm out of the writing mood =( someone threaten me! be like, if you don't write i'll kill you!

anyways, FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL!

it was a LOOOOOT better than I thought it would be.
so it started off with my bff and her bro (cutie) going to school, I found out me and my friend's bro have class together yaaay.

so first period was good, i have one of my old bffs, and a cool friend still, in there, plus this other girl adi. and this hot boy sits next to me.
i also have a awesome teacher, he's so funny.

2nd period i walked my friend's bro (his name is brandon) to class cuz we have it together. i have about 6 people I know in there, including him. so that was good. everyone was so mean to the teacher cuz he looks weird it made me want to cry!!!

3rd period I had ROP manicuring, actually it was from 3rd to 4th and we had to sit around and do nothing for 2 hours. so me, adi and this other girl lacy that i have in my 2nd period(both I only know a little bit) hung out and went to switch our schedules around. I don't have ROp anymore, instead I have

3rd period=teacher aide for my favorite (HOOOOT) teacher last year.
4th period=child care(didn't want it, only option left)

so me and lacy (who I BARELY know) sat aruond and talked for like an hour after we switched our schedulse around. I was supposed to go to my 4th period but decided to ditch it since I wasn't on the roster anyway. and yah we are kinda friends now, which is cool. (i haven't been to my 3rd or 4th period yet. So i have two brand new classes tommorow)

THEN 5th period I have english, and I don't know anybody there, cept adi, but she has other friends and this annoying girl kept talking to me ugh.

then 6th i have health and careers but I ditched with my friend so yah, my day went pretty good. there are these 3 bitches I hate, I had hoped they moved but sadly they didn't, although the 1 of the 3 bitches dosen't go to our school yay! and I had no classes with them!!!!! well not so far, and I don't think I will.

so anyways, a good day, better than I thought. so yay =D

anyone else wanna talk about their first day?

first day tommorow. more excited than nervous. hope it'll be good. will post about the details tommorw nice.

i'm excited, i think i have class with my bff's brother ;)

so yesterday i went to my bff's birthday party with her and her (hot) brother lol but anyways her cuzns were okay they weren't too friendly except one cuzn he was totally HOT! omg he was a football player i found out

and like i didn't talk to him for a while, but of course, i looked, then we all sat at a table together me, my bff, my bff's brother, and the cuzn, and me and him talked a ltttle, and when i needed a napkin he went outside to where the napkins were and got me one ;P lol

then we were watching 'meet the fockers' and me and my bff's brother were kinda sitting next to each other, i was on the end of the couch and he was on a chair next to it, and we kind of flirted and stuff. and me and the cuzn, were looking at each other a lot and smiling.

then gifts started being opened and i stood by the cuzn and he asked me if i wantetd a chair i said no then we talked a little. thenn i think i insulted him by making fun of a present his mom got. lol bad wolfe!

but he got over it I think because he kept smiling and talking to me. then he kept teasing me and asking me things and yah, I thinkn he thought i was cute. but he has a gf :(

but yah then i stayed the night at my bff's, and me, her, and her brotherr all played HALO till midnight haha.

it was a fun, boy-filled day.

and we had king taco, it was gross =(

anyways that's the end of my day, gonnna take a shower.

byebyezzzz

wolfe is sad wolfie =/ she cuts. she needs to stop.

in other news ... my friends are bitches. and in OTHER news my ex's broter is super duper cute! I wanna like give hihm a kiss hehe.

i think he likes me =D but nothing could ever happen, it'd be too awkard. like for real. OMG yesterday he smiled at me and seriously he looked JUST like sora it was like OMG a total sora smile! i think i balcked out for a second!

and in otherother news ... can someone help me with the second chapter of my fic 'shatter me' i'm like lost at what to do with a character.

i'm s oupset. why do people have to be so mean =/ specifically ... my bff. god she got mad at me for like nothing i didn't even do anything. dumb bitch. like she was annoyed at her dad and bro and took it out on me so bad. ugh i'm sick of her. when school starts i'm gna try sooooo daaaaamn hard to make new friends.

axel -drools- or riku. NO Sora because he's cute sweet and coudl save me yay. but axel could too and we'd have hot se--oh uhm talk.

axel for sure.

is the ff.net log in not working for anyone else too? =/

sooo haven't updated in a while. my friend came back from bb and we've been hanging out that's why. its been fun. i like my hair better now. i got extnsions thouhg so i could wear them if ii wantt. pics later. my laptop keys aree being gay =/
senior pictures monday ugh idk how o dod my hair!

ooh today i went to raging waters! i got burnt sadly (i nnever do thouogh idky i did todday) and OMFG! i saw the cutest boy theere i keptt looking at him and he kept lookinig at mee but nothing happened =( i was pretty sad lol but I gott overr iit.

omg! i was on a writing streak, now I have WB =/ grr, hopefully i can get out of it.

lol raging watesr, we wet into this stream thing wherer you ufloat in a abig circle pathyway thing (like a river) and it was so funy peoeple kept geetting stuck under my floatie haha. it was an innertube kind.

anyway, fun day.

everyone would have to do eco-friendly things for the whole day. and if they didn't, i'd find them :)

well this is really old so if i can remember right ... well it was really really random and just stuck I guess. And then I developed the nickname Wolfie, which I thought was cute.
BUT, if I could change the name, it'd be sweet pandamonium, which i use for a lot of things,

because my friend said i looked like a panda and soon they became my fav animals. and i wanted to be like the myspacers who did like ashelyanorexic so i put [panda]moniuim (back when i had a myspace) then my ex-friend was like, add sweet in it from that one song, so sweet pandamonium

and it just stuck.

school in 2 weeks. and i feel like a loser because i'm worried only about one thing, well 3.

these three girls at my school that gave me problems all through last school year =/

i'll admit, it wasn't anything too bad but they harassed me, tried to steal who i was going out with, gave me dirty looks, made me just really uncomfortable and one of them even had the gall to scraem at me "yah you better run you fucking cunt" across the street.

the ONLY godo thing is when i'm with my bff they don't bother me cuz they like her and don't wanna get on her badside. But she hates them =)

i know the only reason they bug me is cuz they're jealous but i'm so worried that they will have classes with me and i'm not exactly that social so they might have friends and i'll be all loner status and they'll bug me.

and i hate confrontaion =/ the only possibility is that 2 of them moved. which they actually might have, its rumored they did. and the other one goes to a diff school but is supposed to come back this year, 2nd semester, but i doubt she'll wait till 2nd semester.

ahh im just scared, i just really hope they are over it arlady, they hadn't been bugging me the last few months of school but i know they will if we have classes.

ahh why am i such a loser? it's dumb to worry about them.